retold-data-service 2.0.21 → 2.0.23

package/generate-bookstore-comprehension.js

@@ -0,0 +1,645 @@
+#!/usr/bin/env node
+/**
+ * Retold Bookstore Comprehension Generator
+ *
+ * Generates a stand-alone comprehension JSON file containing:
+ *  - 10,000 Authors
+ *  - 10,000 Books
+ *  - ~15,000 BookAuthorJoin records
+ *  - ~200 hilarious fictitious Reviewers (Users)
+ *  - ~25,000 Reviews
+ *
+ * Shaped for the retold-harness schema (Book, Author, BookAuthorJoin, Review, User).
+ */
+'use strict';
+
+const libFS = require('fs');
+const libPath = require('path');
+const libCrypto = require('crypto');
+
+// ================================================================
+// Deterministic PRNG (xorshift128+) so output is reproducible
+// ================================================================
+let _Seed0 = BigInt('0xBEEFCAFEDEAD1234');
+let _Seed1 = BigInt('0xFACEFEED42424242');
+
+function nextRandom()
+{
+	let tmpS1 = _Seed0;
+	let tmpS0 = _Seed1;
+	_Seed0 = tmpS0;
+	tmpS1 ^= (tmpS1 << 23n) & 0xFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFn;
+	tmpS1 ^= tmpS1 >> 17n;
+	tmpS1 ^= tmpS0;
+	tmpS1 ^= tmpS0 >> 26n;
+	_Seed1 = tmpS1;
+	let tmpResult = Number((_Seed0 + _Seed1) & 0x7FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFn);
+	return tmpResult / 0x7FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF;
+}
+
+function randInt(pMin, pMax)
+{
+	return Math.floor(nextRandom() * (pMax - pMin + 1)) + pMin;
+}
+
+function pick(pArray)
+{
+	return pArray[randInt(0, pArray.length - 1)];
+}
+
+function pickN(pArray, pN)
+{
+	let tmpCopy = pArray.slice();
+	let tmpResult = [];
+	for (let i = 0; i < pN && tmpCopy.length > 0; i++)
+	{
+		let tmpIdx = randInt(0, tmpCopy.length - 1);
+		tmpResult.push(tmpCopy[tmpIdx]);
+		tmpCopy.splice(tmpIdx, 1);
+	}
+	return tmpResult;
+}
+
+function uuid()
+{
+	return libCrypto.randomUUID();
+}
+
+function isoDate(pYear, pMonth, pDay)
+{
+	let tmpM = String(pMonth).padStart(2, '0');
+	let tmpD = String(pDay).padStart(2, '0');
+	return `${pYear}-${tmpM}-${tmpD}T00:00:00.000Z`;
+}
+
+function randomDate(pStartYear, pEndYear)
+{
+	let tmpYear = randInt(pStartYear, pEndYear);
+	let tmpMonth = randInt(1, 12);
+	let tmpDay = randInt(1, 28);
+	let tmpHour = randInt(0, 23);
+	let tmpMin = randInt(0, 59);
+	let tmpSec = randInt(0, 59);
+	return `${tmpYear}-${String(tmpMonth).padStart(2, '0')}-${String(tmpDay).padStart(2, '0')}T${String(tmpHour).padStart(2, '0')}:${String(tmpMin).padStart(2, '0')}:${String(tmpSec).padStart(2, '0')}.000Z`;
+}
+
+// ================================================================
+// Name Data
+// ================================================================
+const FIRST_NAMES = [
+	'Abigail', 'Alaric', 'Amara', 'Augustus', 'Barnaby', 'Beatrix', 'Benedict', 'Bernadette',
+	'Calliope', 'Cassandra', 'Cedric', 'Clementine', 'Cornelius', 'Dagmar', 'Delphine', 'Desmond',
+	'Ebenezer', 'Eloise', 'Erasmus', 'Esmeralda', 'Evangeline', 'Fabian', 'Felicity', 'Ferdinand',
+	'Geraldine', 'Gideon', 'Griselda', 'Guinevere', 'Hadrian', 'Hortense', 'Ignatius', 'Imogen',
+	'Jasper', 'Josephine', 'Juniper', 'Lavinia', 'Leopold', 'Lucinda', 'Magnus', 'Marguerite',
+	'Maximilian', 'Millicent', 'Montgomery', 'Mortimer', 'Narcissa', 'Neville', 'Octavia', 'Ophelia',
+	'Percival', 'Petronella', 'Philomena', 'Prudence', 'Quentin', 'Reginald', 'Rosalind', 'Rupert',
+	'Sebastian', 'Seraphina', 'Sigmund', 'Sophronia', 'Thaddeus', 'Theodora', 'Ulysses', 'Valentina',
+	'Winifred', 'Wolfgang', 'Xenophon', 'Yolanda', 'Zachariah', 'Zenobia', 'Aldous', 'Anastasia',
+	'Bartholomew', 'Bianca', 'Cosimo', 'Dorothea', 'Edmund', 'Flora', 'Godfrey', 'Hermione',
+	'Isadora', 'Jerome', 'Katarina', 'Lysander', 'Minerva', 'Nigel', 'Ottilie', 'Penelope',
+	'Raphael', 'Sybil', 'Tobias', 'Ursula', 'Vivienne', 'Wilfred', 'Xander', 'Yvette'
+];
+
+const LAST_NAMES = [
+	'Abernathy', 'Blackwood', 'Carmichael', 'Devereaux', 'Elderberry', 'Featherbottom', 'Grimshaw',
+	'Hawthorne', 'Inglesworth', 'Jabberwock', 'Knickerbocker', 'Lumpkin', 'Muttonchop', 'Noodlebrain',
+	'Obfuscate', 'Pumpernickel', 'Quagmire', 'Rumblebottom', 'Snorkeldink', 'Thistlethwaite',
+	'Underpants', 'Vonderschmidt', 'Whipplesnaith', 'Xylophone', 'Yammerschnook', 'Zeppelinski',
+	'Bumblesnort', 'Crumpetface', 'Dingleberry', 'Flapdoodle', 'Goosegrease', 'Humblebrag',
+	'Jigglewhistle', 'Kettledrum', 'Lollygag', 'Mumblechops', 'Niffleheim', 'Oozelfinch',
+	'Piddlesworth', 'Quibbleston', 'Rigmarole', 'Snotwhistle', 'Twaddlecock', 'Umbridge',
+	'Wigglesworth', 'Bamboozle', 'Codswallop', 'Dillydally', 'Flibbertigibbet', 'Gobsmack',
+	'Hullabaloo', 'Jumblefudge', 'Kerfuffle', 'Lollipop', 'Malarkey', 'Nincompoop',
+	'Paddywack', 'Ramshackle', 'Skedaddle', 'Taradiddle', 'Whatchamacallit', 'Brouhaha',
+	'Cattywampus', 'Discombobulate', 'Flummox', 'Gazump', 'Hodgepodge', 'Lickspittle',
+	'Mudpuddle', 'Nubbins', 'Poppycock', 'Ragamuffin', 'Slapdash', 'Tomfoolery',
+	'Widdershins', 'Zigzag', 'Ballyhoo', 'Claptrap', 'Donnybrook', 'Fiddle-faddle',
+	'Gibberish', 'Hobbledehoy', 'Lickety-split', 'Muckraker', 'Namby-pamby', 'Piffle',
+	'Razzmatazz', 'Skullduggery', 'Thingamajig', 'Whirligig', 'Balderdash', 'Canoodle',
+	'Doohickey', 'Fandango', 'Gadabout', 'Higgledy-piggledy', 'Inglenook', 'Jalopy'
+];
+
+const AUTHOR_FIRST_NAMES = [
+	'Agatha', 'Albert', 'Alice', 'Anton', 'Arthur', 'Barbara', 'Bertrand', 'Boris',
+	'Charlotte', 'Clara', 'Dashiell', 'Doris', 'Dorothy', 'Edgar', 'Edith', 'Eleanor',
+	'Emily', 'Ernest', 'Evelyn', 'Frances', 'Franz', 'Fyodor', 'Gabriel', 'George',
+	'Gertrude', 'Graham', 'Gustave', 'Hannah', 'Harper', 'Harriet', 'Heinrich', 'Henry',
+	'Herman', 'Hugo', 'Iris', 'Isaac', 'Ivan', 'Jack', 'James', 'Jane',
+	'Jean-Paul', 'Jorge', 'Joseph', 'Joyce', 'Julio', 'Katherine', 'Kurt', 'Leo',
+	'Louisa', 'Marcel', 'Margaret', 'Mark', 'Mary', 'Maya', 'Milan', 'Muriel',
+	'Naguib', 'Nikolai', 'Octavio', 'Oscar', 'Pablo', 'Patricia', 'Philip', 'Ray',
+	'Rebecca', 'Robert', 'Rosa', 'Salman', 'Samuel', 'Simone', 'Sylvia', 'Thomas',
+	'Toni', 'Umberto', 'Ursula', 'Virginia', 'Vladimir', 'Voltaire', 'Walt', 'Willa',
+	'William', 'Zadie', 'Zora', 'Chinua', 'Chimamanda', 'Orhan', 'Kazuo', 'Haruki',
+	'Isabel', 'Italo', 'Yukio', 'Murasaki', 'Rabindranath', 'Rumi', 'Khalil', 'Nikos'
+];
+
+const AUTHOR_LAST_NAMES = [
+	'Achebe', 'Adichie', 'Allende', 'Amis', 'Angelou', 'Asimov', 'Atwood', 'Austen',
+	'Ballard', 'Balzac', 'Beckett', 'Borges', 'Bradbury', 'Brontë', 'Bulgakov', 'Calvino',
+	'Camus', 'Capote', 'Carver', 'Cervantes', 'Chandler', 'Chekhov', 'Christie', 'Coelho',
+	'Collins', 'Conrad', 'Cortázar', 'de Beauvoir', 'Dickens', 'Dostoevsky', 'Dumas', 'Eco',
+	'Eliot', 'Ellison', 'Faulkner', 'Fitzgerald', 'Flaubert', 'Forster', 'Franzen', 'García Márquez',
+	'Gibran', 'Goethe', 'Gogol', 'Golding', 'Grass', 'Greene', 'Hammett', 'Hardy',
+	'Heller', 'Hemingway', 'Hesse', 'Hugo', 'Hurston', 'Huxley', 'Irving', 'Ishiguro',
+	'James', 'Joyce', 'Kafka', 'Kazantzakis', 'Keats', 'Kerouac', 'Kipling', 'Kundera',
+	'Le Guin', 'Lee', 'Lessing', 'Lewis', 'London', 'Lovecraft', 'Mahfouz', 'Mailer',
+	'Mann', 'Maugham', 'McCarthy', 'McEwan', 'Melville', 'Miller', 'Mishima', 'Morrison',
+	'Murakami', 'Nabokov', 'Naipaul', 'Neruda', 'Oates', 'Orwell', 'Pamuk', 'Pasternak',
+	'Plath', 'Poe', 'Proust', 'Pynchon', 'Roth', 'Rushdie', 'Salinger', 'Saramago',
+	'Sartre', 'Shelley', 'Shikibu', 'Smith', 'Solzhenitsyn', 'Steinbeck', 'Stendhal', 'Tagore',
+	'Tolstoy', 'Twain', 'Updike', 'Verne', 'Vonnegut', 'Walker', 'Waugh', 'Welty',
+	'Wharton', 'Whitman', 'Wilde', 'Woolf', 'Wright', 'Yeats', 'Zola'
+];
+
+const GENRES = [
+	'Fiction', 'Literary Fiction', 'Science Fiction', 'Fantasy', 'Mystery', 'Thriller',
+	'Romance', 'Horror', 'Historical Fiction', 'Adventure', 'Dystopian', 'Gothic',
+	'Magical Realism', 'Satire', 'Western', 'Crime', 'Noir', 'Cyberpunk',
+	'Steampunk', 'Post-Apocalyptic', 'Absurdist', 'Philosophical', 'Humor',
+	'Young Adult', 'Graphic Novel', 'Memoir', 'Biography', 'True Crime',
+	'Self-Help', 'Poetry', 'Drama', 'Essay Collection'
+];
+
+const BOOK_TYPES = ['Hardcover', 'Paperback', 'E-Book', 'Audiobook'];
+
+const LANGUAGES = ['en', 'es', 'fr', 'de', 'it', 'pt', 'ru', 'ja', 'zh', 'ko', 'ar', 'hi'];
+
+// ================================================================
+// Hilarious Book Title Generation
+// ================================================================
+function gerund(pVerb)
+{
+	if (pVerb.endsWith('e')) return pVerb.slice(0, -1) + 'ing';
+	return pVerb + 'ing';
+}
+
+const TITLE_PATTERNS = [
+	() => `The ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN)}`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_NOUN)} of the ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}`,
+	() => `A Brief History of ${pick(TITLE_ABSURD)}`,
+	() => `${gerund(pick(TITLE_VERB))} the ${pick(TITLE_NOUN)}`,
+	() => `The ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN)}'s Guide to ${pick(TITLE_ABSURD)}`,
+	() => `Why ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}s ${pick(TITLE_VERB)} at Night`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_NUMBER)} Shades of ${pick(TITLE_COLOR)}`,
+	() => `The Secret Life of ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}s`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)} and ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}: A Love Story`,
+	() => `How to ${pick(TITLE_VERB)} Your ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)} in ${pick(TITLE_NUMBER)} Easy Steps`,
+	() => `The ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)} Who ${pick(TITLE_VERB_PAST)} Too Much`,
+	() => `Confessions of a ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}`,
+	() => `Don't ${pick(TITLE_VERB)} the ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}`,
+	() => `The ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)} Who ${pick(TITLE_VERB_PAST)} ${pick(TITLE_PLACE)}`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}: The Untold Story`,
+	() => `Everything You Wanted to Know About ${pick(TITLE_ABSURD)} But Were Afraid to Ask`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_ABSURD)} and Other Lies I Tell Myself`,
+	() => `The ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} Art of ${gerund(pick(TITLE_VERB))} ${pick(TITLE_ABSURD)}`,
+	() => `${pick(TITLE_EXCLAIM)}! A ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)}'s Memoir`,
+	() => `My ${pick(TITLE_NOUN2)} Is a ${pick(TITLE_ADJ)} ${pick(TITLE_NOUN)}`,
+];
+
+const TITLE_ADJ = [
+	'Melancholy', 'Effervescent', 'Lugubrious', 'Phantasmagorical', 'Quixotic', 'Indolent',
+	'Thunderous', 'Preposterous', 'Magnificent', 'Bewildered', 'Flatulent', 'Suspicious',
+	'Cantankerous', 'Discombobulated', 'Flamboyant', 'Querulous', 'Inscrutable', 'Luminous',
+	'Persnickety', 'Obstreperous', 'Crepuscular', 'Sesquipedalian', 'Defenestrated', 'Bamboozled',
+	'Flabbergasted', 'Gobsmacked', 'Hornswoggled', 'Befuddled', 'Perpendicular', 'Translucent'
+];
+
+const TITLE_NOUN = [
+	'Dinghy', 'Archipelago', 'Quandary', 'Haberdashery', 'Catacombs', 'Brouhaha',
+	'Pandemonium', 'Labyrinth', 'Contraption', 'Kerfuffle', 'Rigmarole', 'Hullabaloo',
+	'Phenomenon', 'Colosseum', 'Symposium', 'Conspiracy', 'Kaleidoscope', 'Anthology',
+	'Emporium', 'Compendium', 'Conundrum', 'Extravaganza', 'Fiasco', 'Jamboree'
+];
+
+const TITLE_NOUN2 = [
+	'Badger', 'Platypus', 'Walrus', 'Accountant', 'Pirate', 'Librarian', 'Iguana',
+	'Astronaut', 'Gondolier', 'Yeti', 'Penguin', 'Taxidermist', 'Sausage', 'Kumquat',
+	'Narwhal', 'Flamingo', 'Hedgehog', 'Beekeeper', 'Cartographer', 'Sommelier',
+	'Wombat', 'Capybara', 'Sasquatch', 'Pudding', 'Hamster', 'Philosopher',
+	'Lumberjack', 'Manatee', 'Barista', 'Zeppelin', 'Turnip', 'Octopus'
+];
+
+const TITLE_VERB = [
+	'Juggle', 'Contemplate', 'Serenade', 'Befriend', 'Investigate', 'Negotiate',
+	'Interrogate', 'Catapult', 'Marinate', 'Alphabetize', 'Domesticate', 'Hypnotize',
+	'Procrastinate', 'Discombobulate', 'Bamboozle', 'Exfoliate', 'Gallivant', 'Perambulate'
+];
+
+const TITLE_VERB_PAST = [
+	'Juggled', 'Contemplated', 'Serenaded', 'Befriended', 'Investigated', 'Negotiated',
+	'Catapulted', 'Marinated', 'Alphabetized', 'Domesticated', 'Hypnotized', 'Vanquished',
+	'Bamboozled', 'Exfoliated', 'Gallivanted', 'Perambulated', 'Discombobulated', 'Yodeled'
+];
+
+const TITLE_ABSURD = [
+	'Quantum Socks', 'Interdimensional Cheese', 'Existential Laundry', 'Competitive Napping',
+	'Artisanal Dust', 'Gluten-Free Darkness', 'Organic Regret', 'Dehydrated Water',
+	'Bureaucratic Ecstasy', 'Weaponized Politeness', 'Industrial Whimsy', 'Tactical Knitting',
+	'Philosophical Plumbing', 'Militant Optimism', 'Acoustic Gravity', 'Vintage Nonsense',
+	'Performative Confusion', 'Recreational Mathematics', 'Theoretical Sandwiches', 'Applied Daydreaming',
+	'Aggressive Tranquility', 'Passive-Aggressive Furniture', 'Hyperbolic Geometry', 'Sentient Yogurt'
+];
+
+const TITLE_COLOR = [
+	'Beige', 'Taupe', 'Chartreuse', 'Puce', 'Mauve', 'Ecru', 'Cerulean', 'Vermillion',
+	'Ochre', 'Magenta', 'Periwinkle', 'Maroon', 'Turquoise', 'Burgundy'
+];
+
+const TITLE_NUMBER = [
+	'Seventeen', 'Forty-Two', 'Three-and-a-Half', 'Ninety-Nine', 'Seven Hundred',
+	'Approximately Twelve', 'Pi', 'A Disturbing Number of', 'Far Too Many', 'Negative Six'
+];
+
+const TITLE_PLACE = [
+	'at Midnight', 'in Prague', 'Under the Stairs', 'Behind the Fridge', 'in a Canoe',
+	'on the Moon', 'During Brunch', 'in the Produce Aisle', 'at the DMV', 'Underwater'
+];
+
+const TITLE_EXCLAIM = [
+	'Zounds', 'Great Scott', 'Good Grief', 'Thunderation', 'Egads', 'Crikey',
+	'Balderdash', 'Fiddlesticks', 'Blimey', 'Sacré Bleu', 'Heavens to Betsy'
+];
+
+// ================================================================
+// Hilarious Reviewer Personas and Review Templates
+// ================================================================
+const REVIEWER_PERSONAS = [
+	{ first: 'Karen', last: 'Managerdemander', bio: 'Professional complainer, amateur sommelier' },
+	{ first: 'Chad', last: 'Thunderflex', bio: 'Reads exclusively while doing bicep curls' },
+	{ first: 'Gertrude', last: 'Miffington', bio: 'Has been personally offended by every book since 1987' },
+	{ first: 'Bartholomew', last: 'Snifflebutt', bio: 'PhD in Unnecessarily Long Reviews' },
+	{ first: 'Dolores', last: 'Umbridge-Adjacent', bio: 'Gives 1 star if the font displeases her' },
+	{ first: 'Reginald', last: 'Pompington III', bio: 'Only reads leather-bound first editions, darling' },
+	{ first: 'Brenda', last: 'Spoilerman', bio: 'Has never not spoiled an ending in a review' },
+	{ first: 'Eugene', last: 'Tangentsworth', bio: 'Starts reviewing the book but ends up talking about soup' },
+	{ first: 'Mildred', last: 'Catladyton', bio: 'Reviews all books from the perspective of her 17 cats' },
+	{ first: 'Derek', last: 'One-Star', bio: 'Has literally never given anything more than one star' },
+	{ first: 'Penelope', last: 'Plottwist', bio: 'Insists every book should have ended differently' },
+	{ first: 'Harold', last: 'Didnt-Read', bio: 'Reviews books based solely on the cover' },
+	{ first: 'Francesca', last: 'Dramática', bio: 'Describes every book as if it changed her molecular structure' },
+	{ first: 'Norman', last: 'Footnote', bio: 'Reviews consist entirely of pedantic corrections' },
+	{ first: 'Agatha', last: 'Conspiracy', bio: 'Finds hidden messages in every ISBN number' },
+	{ first: 'Chester', last: 'Audiobook', bio: 'Only listens at 4x speed, very confused always' },
+	{ first: 'Patricia', last: 'Wrong-Genre', bio: 'Keeps reviewing sci-fi books as if they were cookbooks' },
+	{ first: 'Mortimer', last: 'Lengthy', bio: 'His reviews are always longer than the actual book' },
+	{ first: 'Daphne', last: 'Emoji-Only', bio: 'Expresses all literary criticism through emoji descriptions' },
+	{ first: 'Cornelius', last: 'Off-Topic', bio: 'Every review somehow becomes about his neighbor\'s lawn' },
+	{ first: 'Gladys', last: 'Humblebrag', bio: 'Every review mentions her beach house in the Hamptons' },
+	{ first: 'Lester', last: 'Misprint', bio: 'Found a typo on page 347 and will never recover' },
+	{ first: 'Wanda', last: 'Five-Stars', bio: 'Gives everything five stars including parking tickets' },
+	{ first: 'Frank', last: 'Spooked', bio: 'Is frightened by all genres including self-help' },
+	{ first: 'Eunice', last: 'Metaphor', bio: 'Speaks exclusively in increasingly strained metaphors' },
+	{ first: 'Percival', last: 'Snooze-Critic', bio: 'Rates books by how well they put him to sleep' },
+	{ first: 'Tabitha', last: 'Bookclub', bio: 'Her bookclub is a front for her wine drinking operation' },
+	{ first: 'Vincent', last: 'Margins', bio: 'Has strong opinions exclusively about kerning and margins' },
+	{ first: 'Maude', last: 'Nostalgia', bio: 'Everything was better in a decade she wasn\'t alive for' },
+	{ first: 'Nigel', last: 'Pedantic', bio: 'Actually, it\'s not a novel, it\'s a novella. Actually...' },
+	{ first: 'Bunny', last: 'Chaos', bio: 'Returns library books to random shelves for sport' },
+	{ first: 'Gerald', last: 'Overthink', bio: 'Still processing the implications of Green Eggs and Ham' },
+	{ first: 'Helga', last: 'Booksmell', bio: 'Rates books 40% on content, 60% on the smell of the pages' },
+	{ first: 'Clive', last: 'Clickbait', bio: 'You WON\'T BELIEVE what he thinks about chapter seven' },
+	{ first: 'Doris', last: 'Dewey-Decimal', bio: 'Has strong feelings about the classification of this work' },
+	{ first: 'Rufus', last: 'Dog-Ears', bio: 'Dog-ears every single page, fights anyone who objects' },
+	{ first: 'Priscilla', last: 'Microphone', bio: 'Reads aloud in coffee shops to assert dominance' },
+	{ first: 'Ambrose', last: 'Thesaurus', bio: 'Never uses a simple word when a grandiloquent one will suffice' },
+	{ first: 'Blanche', last: 'Snack-Reader', bio: 'Cannot separate the reading experience from the snacks consumed' },
+	{ first: 'Octavius', last: 'Sequel-Demand', bio: 'Demands a sequel to every book, including dictionaries' },
+];
+
+const REVIEW_TEMPLATES_POSITIVE = [
+	(pBook) => `This book spoke to my soul. My soul then asked it to keep it down because it was trying to nap.`,
+	(pBook) => `I laughed, I cried, I accidentally read the whole thing in the bathtub and now my copy is wavy.`,
+	(pBook) => `Absolutely magnificent. I've recommended it to everyone I know, and several people I don't.`,
+	(pBook) => `Five stars. Would have given six but the rating system is an oppressive construct.`,
+	(pBook) => `I finished this book three weeks ago and I still can't talk about it without getting emotional. My therapist is concerned.`,
+	(pBook) => `Better than anything I could write, and I once wrote a strongly worded letter to my HOA that made a grown man cry.`,
+	(pBook) => `This is the book I didn't know I needed, much like that third slice of pie at 2am.`,
+	(pBook) => `I was so engrossed I missed my subway stop. Twice. I don't even take the subway.`,
+	(pBook) => `A tour de force. A chef-d'oeuvre. A magnum opus. I've been reading the thesaurus again, can you tell?`,
+	(pBook) => `Every sentence is a gift. Every paragraph, a revelation. Every chapter, an excuse to ignore my responsibilities.`,
+	(pBook) => `I read this in one sitting. My chiropractor says that was a mistake, but my heart says otherwise.`,
+	(pBook) => `Changed my perspective on life, love, and the correct way to load a dishwasher.`,
+	(pBook) => `Gave this to my book club. We were supposed to discuss it for an hour. It's been six months. We're still going.`,
+	(pBook) => `My cat walked across the keyboard to type this: kkkkkjjjjj. She agrees it's phenomenal.`,
+	(pBook) => `I highlighted so many passages my book is now entirely yellow. It's basically a legal pad at this point.`,
+];
+
+const REVIEW_TEMPLATES_NEGATIVE = [
+	(pBook) => `I've read better prose on shampoo bottles. At least those have clear instructions.`,
+	(pBook) => `One star. The only thing this book is good for is leveling my wobbly table, and even then the table complained.`,
+	(pBook) => `I want the hours of my life back. And a formal apology. In writing. Notarized.`,
+	(pBook) => `My neighbor's lawn looks better than this plot, and his lawn is TERRIBLE. Jeff, if you're reading this, mow it.`,
+	(pBook) => `DNF. Did Not Finish. Did Not Enjoy. Did Not understand why this exists.`,
+	(pBook) => `The author clearly wrote this during a fever dream and then just... published it? In THIS economy?`,
+	(pBook) => `I found a typo on page 12 and honestly I never recovered. The trust was broken.`,
+	(pBook) => `This book is the literary equivalent of stepping on a LEGO in the dark.`,
+	(pBook) => `My reading group selected this. We are no longer a reading group. We are a support group.`,
+	(pBook) => `I've had more compelling narratives from my dishwasher's error codes.`,
+	(pBook) => `Put me to sleep faster than melatonin. Actually, I should thank the author. I haven't slept that well in years.`,
+	(pBook) => `I got this for free and I still feel overcharged.`,
+];
+
+const REVIEW_TEMPLATES_MEDIUM = [
+	(pBook) => `Three stars. It was fine. Like airport sushi — technically edible but you have questions.`,
+	(pBook) => `A solid meh. Not bad enough to be interesting, not good enough to be memorable.`,
+	(pBook) => `I've read worse. I've also read better. I've also read the back of cereal boxes, which was comparable.`,
+	(pBook) => `The first half was brilliant. The second half was... present. It was definitely there.`,
+	(pBook) => `It's the kind of book you read once, go "huh," and then forget about until someone mentions it at a party.`,
+	(pBook) => `Three stars. Lost one star for the plot twist I saw coming from chapter two. Lost another because my sandwich got soggy while reading.`,
+	(pBook) => `Some parts made me think. Other parts made me think about what I was going to have for dinner.`,
+	(pBook) => `I'll say this: it's a book. It has pages. Words are on those pages. Some of them are in the right order.`,
+	(pBook) => `Perfectly adequate. Like a beige wall. You don't hate it, but you're not hanging a frame around it either.`,
+	(pBook) => `Would I recommend it? Maybe. Would I recommend it enthusiastically? I'd recommend it at room temperature.`,
+];
+
+const REVIEW_TEMPLATES_CHAOTIC = [
+	(pBook) => `I haven't read this but the cover is blue and I'm a Sagittarius so three stars.`,
+	(pBook) => `Great product! Shipping was fast. Oh wait, this is a book review? Same rating though.`,
+	(pBook) => `I bought this thinking it was a cookbook. It is NOT a cookbook. Made the worst soup of my life from chapter 3.`,
+	(pBook) => `I listened to this audiobook at 4x speed. I now speak exclusively in plot summaries and I can't stop.`,
+	(pBook) => `My dog ate this book. Literally. He seemed to enjoy it more than I did. Giving him the review account.`,
+	(pBook) => `Is this the one with the dragon? No? Then why did I read the whole thing thinking there'd be a dragon?`,
+	(pBook) => `I read this during a power outage by candlelight and it was much more dramatic. Five stars for ambiance.`,
+	(pBook) => `The ISBN contains the number 7 three times. Coincidence? I think not. There's something going on here.`,
+	(pBook) => `My book club told me to read this. Joke's on them, I went to the wrong meeting and reviewed a different book entirely. Keeping the review.`,
+	(pBook) => `I sneezed on page 47 and the book didn't say bless you. Rude. Deducting a star.`,
+	(pBook) => `Accidentally brought this to jury duty instead of my actual reading. The defendant's lawyer was interested in my thoughts.`,
+	(pBook) => `If this book were a sandwich, it would be one of those sandwiches where the bread is also a sandwich.`,
+	(pBook) => `The font on page 193 is slightly different and now I can't unsee it. This is a cry for help.`,
+];
+
+// ================================================================
+// Generator
+// ================================================================
+
+console.log('Generating bookstore comprehension data...');
+let tmpStart = Date.now();
+
+// --- Authors (10,000) ---
+console.log('  Generating 10,000 authors...');
+let tmpAuthors = [];
+let tmpAuthorNameSet = new Set();
+
+for (let i = 1; i <= 10000; i++)
+{
+	let tmpFirst, tmpLast, tmpFullName;
+	do
+	{
+		tmpFirst = pick(AUTHOR_FIRST_NAMES);
+		tmpLast = pick(AUTHOR_LAST_NAMES);
+		// Add an optional suffix for uniqueness
+		if (i > 2000)
+		{
+			let tmpSuffixes = ['', ' Jr.', ' Sr.', ' II', ' III', ' IV', ' von ' + pick(LAST_NAMES)];
+			tmpLast = tmpLast + pick(tmpSuffixes);
+		}
+		tmpFullName = tmpFirst + ' ' + tmpLast;
+	}
+	while (tmpAuthorNameSet.has(tmpFullName));
+	tmpAuthorNameSet.add(tmpFullName);
+
+	tmpAuthors.push(
+		{
+			IDAuthor: i,
+			GUIDAuthor: uuid(),
+			CreateDate: randomDate(2015, 2024),
+			CreatingIDUser: 1,
+			UpdateDate: randomDate(2024, 2025),
+			UpdatingIDUser: 1,
+			Deleted: 0,
+			DeleteDate: null,
+			DeletingIDUser: 0,
+			Name: tmpFullName,
+			IDUser: 0,
+			IDCustomer: 1
+		});
+}
+
+// --- Books (10,000) ---
+console.log('  Generating 10,000 books...');
+let tmpBooks = [];
+let tmpBookTitleSet = new Set();
+
+for (let i = 1; i <= 10000; i++)
+{
+	let tmpTitle;
+	do
+	{
+		tmpTitle = pick(TITLE_PATTERNS)();
+	}
+	while (tmpBookTitleSet.has(tmpTitle));
+	tmpBookTitleSet.add(tmpTitle);
+
+	let tmpGenre = pick(GENRES);
+	let tmpType = pick(BOOK_TYPES);
+	let tmpLang = pick(LANGUAGES);
+	let tmpYear = randInt(1850, 2025);
+	let tmpISBN = '978-' + randInt(0, 9) + '-' + String(randInt(100, 9999)).padStart(4, '0') + '-' + String(randInt(1000, 9999)) + '-' + randInt(0, 9);
+
+	tmpBooks.push(
+		{
+			IDBook: i,
+			GUIDBook: uuid(),
+			CreateDate: randomDate(2015, 2024),
+			CreatingIDUser: 1,
+			UpdateDate: randomDate(2024, 2025),
+			UpdatingIDUser: 1,
+			Deleted: 0,
+			DeleteDate: null,
+			DeletingIDUser: 0,
+			Title: tmpTitle,
+			Type: tmpType,
+			Genre: tmpGenre,
+			ISBN: tmpISBN,
+			Language: tmpLang,
+			ImageURL: `https://covers.example.com/books/${i}.jpg`,
+			PublicationYear: tmpYear,
+			IDCustomer: 1
+		});
+}
+
+// --- BookAuthorJoin (~15,000) ---
+console.log('  Generating ~15,000 book-author joins...');
+let tmpJoins = [];
+let tmpJoinID = 1;
+
+for (let i = 0; i < tmpBooks.length; i++)
+{
+	let tmpBook = tmpBooks[i];
+	// Most books have 1 author, some have 2-3 co-authors
+	let tmpAuthorCount = 1;
+	let tmpRoll = nextRandom();
+	if (tmpRoll > 0.65) tmpAuthorCount = 2;
+	if (tmpRoll > 0.90) tmpAuthorCount = 3;
+
+	let tmpAuthorIDs = pickN(
+		Array.from({ length: 10000 }, (_, k) => k + 1),
+		tmpAuthorCount
+	);
+
+	for (let a = 0; a < tmpAuthorIDs.length; a++)
+	{
+		tmpJoins.push(
+			{
+				IDBookAuthorJoin: tmpJoinID++,
+				GUIDBookAuthorJoin: uuid(),
+				IDBook: tmpBook.IDBook,
+				IDAuthor: tmpAuthorIDs[a],
+				IDCustomer: 1
+			});
+	}
+}
+
+// --- Hilarious Reviewers (Users) ---
+console.log('  Generating hilarious reviewer personas...');
+let tmpUsers = [];
+let tmpReviewerCount = REVIEWER_PERSONAS.length;
+
+// Generate the named personas first
+for (let i = 0; i < tmpReviewerCount; i++)
+{
+	let tmpPersona = REVIEWER_PERSONAS[i];
+	tmpUsers.push(
+		{
+			IDUser: i + 1,
+			GUIDUser: i + 1,
+			LoginID: (tmpPersona.first.toLowerCase() + '.' + tmpPersona.last.toLowerCase()).replace(/[^a-z.]/g, ''),
+			Password: '',
+			NameFirst: tmpPersona.first,
+			NameLast: tmpPersona.last,
+			FullName: tmpPersona.first + ' ' + tmpPersona.last,
+			Config: '',
+			IDCustomer: 1,
+			Email: tmpPersona.first.toLowerCase() + '@' + tmpPersona.last.toLowerCase().replace(/[^a-z]/g, '') + '.reviews',
+			Phone: '',
+			Address: '',
+			City: '',
+			State: '',
+			Postal: '',
+			Country: ''
+		});
+}
+
+// Generate 160 more silly randomized reviewers to reach ~200
+for (let i = tmpReviewerCount; i < 200; i++)
+{
+	let tmpFirst = pick(FIRST_NAMES);
+	let tmpLast = pick(LAST_NAMES);
+	tmpUsers.push(
+		{
+			IDUser: i + 1,
+			GUIDUser: i + 1,
+			LoginID: (tmpFirst.toLowerCase() + '.' + tmpLast.toLowerCase()).replace(/[^a-z.]/g, ''),
+			Password: '',
+			NameFirst: tmpFirst,
+			NameLast: tmpLast,
+			FullName: tmpFirst + ' ' + tmpLast,
+			Config: '',
+			IDCustomer: 1,
+			Email: tmpFirst.toLowerCase() + '@' + tmpLast.toLowerCase().replace(/[^a-z]/g, '') + '.reviews',
+			Phone: '',
+			Address: '',
+			City: '',
+			State: '',
+			Postal: '',
+			Country: ''
+		});
+}
+
+// --- Reviews (~25,000) ---
+console.log('  Generating ~25,000 reviews...');
+let tmpReviews = [];
+let tmpReviewID = 1;
+let tmpAllReviewTemplates = [].concat(
+	REVIEW_TEMPLATES_POSITIVE,
+	REVIEW_TEMPLATES_NEGATIVE,
+	REVIEW_TEMPLATES_MEDIUM,
+	REVIEW_TEMPLATES_CHAOTIC
+);
+
+for (let i = 0; i < tmpBooks.length; i++)
+{
+	let tmpBook = tmpBooks[i];
+	// Each book gets 0-5 reviews, averaging ~2.5
+	let tmpReviewCount = randInt(0, 5);
+
+	for (let r = 0; r < tmpReviewCount; r++)
+	{
+		let tmpUserID = randInt(1, 200);
+		let tmpRating;
+		let tmpTemplateSet;
+
+		let tmpTemplateRoll = nextRandom();
+		if (tmpTemplateRoll < 0.30)
+		{
+			tmpRating = randInt(4, 5);
+			tmpTemplateSet = REVIEW_TEMPLATES_POSITIVE;
+		}
+		else if (tmpTemplateRoll < 0.50)
+		{
+			tmpRating = randInt(1, 2);
+			tmpTemplateSet = REVIEW_TEMPLATES_NEGATIVE;
+		}
+		else if (tmpTemplateRoll < 0.75)
+		{
+			tmpRating = 3;
+			tmpTemplateSet = REVIEW_TEMPLATES_MEDIUM;
+		}
+		else
+		{
+			tmpRating = randInt(1, 5);
+			tmpTemplateSet = REVIEW_TEMPLATES_CHAOTIC;
+		}
+
+		let tmpTemplate = pick(tmpTemplateSet);
+		let tmpText = tmpTemplate(tmpBook);
+
+		tmpReviews.push(
+			{
+				IDReview: tmpReviewID++,
+				GUIDReview: uuid(),
+				CreateDate: randomDate(2018, 2025),
+				CreatingIDUser: tmpUserID,
+				UpdateDate: randomDate(2024, 2025),
+				UpdatingIDUser: tmpUserID,
+				Deleted: 0,
+				DeleteDate: null,
+				DeletingIDUser: 0,
+				Text: tmpText,
+				Rating: tmpRating,
+				IDBook: tmpBook.IDBook,
+				IDUser: tmpUserID,
+				IDCustomer: 1
+			});
+	}
+}
+
+// ================================================================
+// Assemble Comprehension
+// ================================================================
+let tmpComprehension =
+{
+	Author: tmpAuthors,
+	Book: tmpBooks,
+	BookAuthorJoin: tmpJoins,
+	User: tmpUsers,
+	Review: tmpReviews
+};
+
+let tmpElapsed = ((Date.now() - tmpStart) / 1000).toFixed(1);
+console.log(`\nComprehension generated in ${tmpElapsed}s:`);
+console.log(`  Authors:          ${tmpAuthors.length.toLocaleString()}`);
+console.log(`  Books:            ${tmpBooks.length.toLocaleString()}`);
+console.log(`  BookAuthorJoins:  ${tmpJoins.length.toLocaleString()}`);
+console.log(`  Users (Reviewers):${tmpUsers.length.toLocaleString()}`);
+console.log(`  Reviews:          ${tmpReviews.length.toLocaleString()}`);
+console.log(`  Total records:    ${(tmpAuthors.length + tmpBooks.length + tmpJoins.length + tmpUsers.length + tmpReviews.length).toLocaleString()}`);
+
+let tmpOutputPath = libPath.join(__dirname, 'bookstore-comprehension.json');
+console.log(`\nWriting to ${tmpOutputPath}...`);
+libFS.writeFileSync(tmpOutputPath, JSON.stringify(tmpComprehension, null, '\t'));
+
+let tmpFileSizeMB = (libFS.statSync(tmpOutputPath).size / 1048576).toFixed(1);
+console.log(`Done! (${tmpFileSizeMB} MB)`);